There comes a time in every child’s life when they must put away childish things. Not so for The Handshake Deals. Instead, they choose to double down on unabashed freedom to bring you a sound unspoiled by broken dreams and the cold realities of modern times.
Just listen closely to the innate wisdom of the ages that flows from the fingers of The Handshake Deals and you may be reminded to steer clear of the crestfallen masses, nay, the broken gumball machine, where you put in a penny and all you get is bum didley. This is the real deal, my fellow travelers, if you seek the path to Turtle Farm by way of Cowhoof Creek and Big Tick Falls, where Gritz the cat died and rose again, where you can fish all day and shower in the sunshine, then look no further than the sounds of The Handshake Deals and let their music be your map.
So gird your loins for raucous pleasure! This is the music of kings, entirely unconcerned with the boundaries of time, geography, age or socio-economics, well…maybe you could throw ‘em a few bucks, hey!
-Captain Scratch of the Hundred Proof Fountain